Recovery Is Found In The Coffee Shop Too...

When people think about recovery they often imagine the big moments... starting therapy, being discharged from the hospital, finishing a meal plan or reaching a milestone, but recovery isn't only found in those moments.

Recovery is found in the coffee shop too, it's found in the cafe you almost cancelled and the drink you nearly didn't order or the slice of cake you almost said "no" to. Those moments might seem small to everyone else but to someone fighting an eating disorder, they're everything because recovery doesn't just happen when you're doing the big work. It happens every time you choose life over the eating disorder. Every time you choose the memory instead of the rule or every time you choose the person sitting opposite you instead of the voice inside your head.

The eating disorder wants your world to become smaller, it wants you to stop saying "yes," it wants birthdays to become excuses, coffee dates to become something you avoid and restaurants to become places you fear until eventually, your world isn't built around the people you love. It ends up being built around the eating disorder but recovery does the opposite, it slowly gives your life back. You eventually stop looking at the menu with fear, you start listening to the conversation instead of the calories, you laugh a little more and you realise the coffee was never the scary part.

One day without even noticing, you'll walk into that same coffee shop and order your favourite drink, sit down, laugh, leave and only afterwards will you realise... you didn't think about the eating disorder once. Not because you forced yourself not to but because life finally became louder than the eating disorder.

So if you're reading this and you've been avoiding the coffee shop... or cancelling plans because food is involved... or ordering what feels safe instead of what you actually wanted, I want you to know that recovery isn't asking you to be fearless. It's simply asking you to take one small step and maybe that step is saying yes to the coffee date or maybe it's ordering the drink you've been thinking about all week. Whatever your step looks like, it counts because recovery isn't built from one huge, life changing moment it's built from hundreds of ordinary steps that quietly teach your brain that life is safe again. One day, you'll sit in that same coffee shop and realise you weren't just drinking a coffee, you were rebuilding your life.

With Love, Niomi 🤎